soul rebels

my dad

2012-01-13T19:20:00.000-08:00

my dad was recently diagnosed with two brain tumors.

we have started a blog about his journey through this.

please join us. the blog address is: rickholladay.blogspot.com

there is also a link to it on the side of this blog, under "friends and family", titled "dad."

evan's birthday week begins!

2011-05-23T10:46:00.000-07:00

little cutie pie turns ONE on thursday, may 26!!! we are so excited that we are going to party every day...

angel baby

2011-05-01T16:35:00.001-07:00

happy sunday.

i love you!

2011-03-17T09:44:00.000-07:00

so, listen to this video and decide for yourself. but it seems pretty clear to me at the end that evan mimics me saying "i love you." i recorded the video for his grammy (vin's grandma) so that is who we are talking to. this is not the first time he has repeated these words. my parents have heard him say it and i got it on my cell phone a few weeks ago. it's pretty cool... enjoy!

cuteness

2011-03-13T21:34:00.000-07:00

evan is now 9 and 1/2 months old! where oh where does time go? here are some fun facts about our sweet boy:

he can say mama and dada (when he feels like it)
when he talks to himself it sounds like he is saying "ya ya" or "ee i ee i oh". in fact we have started calling him yaya.
he has cut his first tooth and the second one should come through any day now.
he is still trying to crawl and combines that with rolling over, sitting up, and bouncing on his bum to get to where he wants to go.
he shakes his head "no" which is hilarious.
he kicks so much we think he is growing to grow up to be a champion soccer player.
he knows the signs for milk and kitty cat.
he loves to snuggle with his mama.
he loves music.
he loves cats and dogs.
he love love loves being in the car and stoller.
he is growing like crazy! he is taller than his 13 month old cousin and we just bought him clothes in size 12-18 months. he has definitely made up for his tiny beginnings.
he loves the bath and cries when he has to get out. he has loved the water ever since his very first bath. he finds it peaceful.
he hates shoes and socks and pulls them off as soon as i put them on.
his favorite object is his "silky" which is a blanket from his aunt mindi and aunt brynn. it is very soft and he cannot sleep without it.
forget toys, just give him a tv remote.

too cute:

silly face:

i love when he smiles and his nose scrunches up.

look at those cheeks!

evan is on the move... sorta

2011-02-19T14:04:00.000-08:00

evan has figured out how to move!!! forget crawling... this little guy is scooting all over. i have tried and tried to help him learn to crawl, but from very early on he would just put his head down and fake cry when on his tummy. he is so funny!!!

evan is 8 months old now and such a delight. he is joyful and sweet and loving. he loves to cuddle and just started saying "mama." he seems to be getting his first tooth, and that has been a little bit hard on him. evan loves the bath and loves to be outside. he is super happy when the wheels are turning under him - either in the car or in his stroller.

we are so blessed to be evan's parents. we have never ever been happier or more content. he is always smiling and wherever we go people squeal over his rosy cheeks and blue eyes. we absolutely adore our sweet baby boy!!!

yeah, baby!!!

2010-10-03T12:08:00.000-07:00

well, as most of you know by now, we have our sweet baby boy, evan! he is everything that we ever dreamed of, and more... he is such a happy baby and loves to be involved in everything.

i will write out the entire story for you all later (because it is awesome!) but just know that we made it to the hospital in time to see him born. what an incredible and beautiful experience!

here are 2 photos of our little evan. in the first he is just seconds old, in the second he is about 3 months old. he is now 4 months.

jewel, take two...

2010-10-03T12:04:00.001-07:00

the judge postponed his ruling for another court date in november. please remember to keep the dursts and jewel in your prayers so that they can be a forever family.

jewel...

2010-09-20T18:39:00.000-07:00

the time is almost here (sept 28th) for the courts of ca to decide this little jewel's fate. please keep her and the dursts in your prayers and thoughts, that she might be able to spend forever with them.

maybe baby?

2010-05-25T18:56:00.000-07:00

we are leaving for the airport in ten minutes... for real!!!

our birthmom is in labor and is expected to have the baby tonight! please pray for her safety, for our little guy's safety and health, and that we make it there in time to see him born!

love you all!
megan and vinny

our baby boy

2010-04-06T17:26:00.001-07:00

as you are all well aware, we are adopting a baby boy that is due to be born june 29th (a week before our 10th wedding anniversary). we are over the moon with happiness!!! we find ourselves wandering through the baby aisles of every store we go into, and discussing boy names endlessly. we are thrilled!

our baby's sweet birthmom has had a few complications during her pregnancy that have led her to be on bed-rest. we are also pretty certain that our little guy will be born premature. we ask for your thoughts and prayers for our baby and his beautiful birthmom that they will be safe and healthy.

thanks to all of you for your support, encouragement, and excitement during this wonderful time in our lives. we can't wait to bring him home and introduce him to all of the family and friends just waiting to meet him.

please check this out...

2010-03-12T11:44:00.000-08:00

i have this amazing friend that i met in college named breclyn. she is pretty much superwoman! she recently asked me to join the board of this awesome organization that she runs called "sixteen small stones." breclyn works tirelessly to relieve the suffering of children around the world.

her main focus is on the orphans of china and africa, but she takes up cases where ever she finds a need.

right now we are trying to collect blankets and fuzzi bunz cloth diapers for a particular group. please go to her blog: sixteensmallstones.blogspot.com for more info. also, there is a link to her blog at the top right of our blog.

please take the time to read through a bit of her blog, she is truely an angel - she is so inspirational...

we met at southern virginia university (when it was still svc) and we clicked instantly. over the years we lost track but thanks to the world of facebook we have re-connected and picked up like we never missed a beat. she is one of my dearest friends on this earth. i admire her to no end. she can move mountains with her faith and with her tireless work. i love her and know that when you read her blog you will love her, too.

ultrasound of our baby boy!

2010-02-26T19:48:00.000-08:00

here is part of the ultrasound where we can hear his heartbeat and see his little hand up by his sweet little face... so amazing!!!

it's a...

2010-02-24T20:01:00.000-08:00

BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(more news to come tomorrow)

we are, of course, thrilled, bewildered, over the moon with happiness and joy!

who has great news?? we do!!! we do!!!

2010-02-11T15:50:00.000-08:00

today we find ourselves in the beautiful state of georgia. why? you may ask... because a wonderful couple has chosen us to adopt their baby! along with all of you they are following us on this journey on our blog - a special shout-out to them!!! we were lucky enough to accompany them to the doctor today. her ultra-sound isn't until next week, but i (megan) got to hear the baby's heartbeat!!!! i have never heard a sweeter sound.

we want to share this with all of you. it looks like she is due the beginning of may, but that is subject to change after the ultra-sound. parenthood -- here we come!!!

we feel so blessed and so lucky and just marvel at how fantastic this all is. these two people who have chosen us are magnificent people with such big hearts.

please enjoy this video...

happy birthday micah!!!

2010-01-29T13:16:00.000-08:00

happy birthday to our oldest nephew, micah!!!

dear micah,

we are so happy to have you in our lives... we love you!!! we hope that your birthday is super fun and that you have some yummy cake!!!

love,

aunt megan and uncle vinny

i think we could all use a laugh...

2010-01-28T11:42:00.001-08:00

i hate it when people scare me... but this is too funny!

friends helping haiti's orphans...

2010-01-21T18:31:00.000-08:00

We know that all of you are aware of the terrible circumstances in Haiti due to the earthquake.

Prior to the earthquake we were in contact with an Orphanage, Foyer Coin Des Cieux: http://internationalsocialwork.wikispaces.com/Foyer%20Coin%20des%20Cieux%20Orphanage?f=print

(please do not donate to the banks listed on their website as they do not have access to their banks at this time- keep reading for ways to help).

The Orphanage is run by a wonderful man, Fritzner Morlant. As many of you know we have been trying to adopt and our hearts have been pulled to Haiti for many years now. Haiti is the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere. Fifty percent of Haiti’s children do not reach their fifth birthday because of poverty and disease. That was before the earthquake. We have a close friend who lived in Haiti for a few years and is very good friends with Fritzner and has talked with him nearly every day since the earthquake. The orphanage was destroyed and now they are taking care of 84 children as opposed to the 24 they had before the catastrophe. Since the earthquake we have personally been in contact with Fritzner and he has expressed a great need to help the children he serves.

We were looking forward to collecting care packages to send to the orphanage, but Fritzner informed us that much of the boxed aid is stolen before it arrives. He said that a lot of the aid being provided in his area goes to whomever is strong enough to steal it, and then it is typically sold to the highest bidder. We don’t know if this is the case everywhere, but we know it to be the case in his area. He drives to the Dominican Republic (far away) to purchase supplies. Unfortunately he is unable to withdraw funds from his banks in Haiti and can only receive money via Western Union.

It is our intention to raise as much money as we can for Fritzner and his ophange. We know these are difficult financial times for us all and many of you have already given to other organizations. Our family has decided to go without a meal or two and donate the money we would have spent on these meals to help feed and care for these children in this orphanage. We ask you to consider seriously what you are able to give. Your sacrifices will go so far to help these children.

We will personally withdraw the money regularly from this account and send it directly to Fritzner via Western Union. There are no third parties involved. Every single penny goes to help the children in this orphanage. Your money will not even be used to pay wire transfer fees.

There are 3 ways to donate:

1. Walk into any Bank of America and deposit any donation into account # 21658-03373
2. If you have a PayPal account you can send any donation by doing the following:

Log in to your PayPal account at www.paypal.com
Click the “send money” tab
Type in: friendshelpinghaitisorphans@gmail.com and the amount of your donation.
Check the “goods” option.
Click “continue”
A new screen pops up confirming and you click “submit money” on the lower right.
We have linked this PayPal account directly to the Bank of America account shown above.

If you do not have a PayPal account it is easy to set one up; go to www.paypal.com

3. You can mail your donations or use any online bill-pay service from your bank; send the donation to:

Vinny and Megan Disanza
For Orphanage
25641 Mesa Edge Ct
Sun City, CA 92585

All donations are very much appreciated. $1.00 is not too little to donate. It is amazing how far it can go when you are sending it to someone who has nothing. Please feel free to pass this on to everyone you wish.

Sincerely,
Vinny and Megan (Holladay) Disanza

vinny_megan@verizon.net

951-679-5787

how to help an orphanage in haiti

2010-01-20T17:52:00.000-08:00

we are in communication with a man who runs an orphanage in haiti. the number of orphans in his care has jumped from 24 to 84 since the earthquake. they do not have access to their bank accounts and are reliant upon western union to get funds to buy necessities to live on. their building has been destroyed!

the director of the orphanage is a member of our church and we can guarantee that every penny will be used to help his orphans. we are creating a paypal account just for this haitian orphanage that should be ready tomorrow. any amount that you can donate will go so far. even if you only can spare $1.00!!! a link to his orphanage website (not in English) is http://internationalsocialwork.wikispaces.com/Foyer+Coin+des+Cieux+Orphanage?f=print
***please*** don't donate via their website as they have no way to access their banks at this time. we thank you so much for your help and prayers. these children are in need of everything.

mlk, jr. - a remarkable man

2010-01-18T17:14:00.001-08:00

well, i tried for quite a while to add a photo of martin luther king, jr. but for some reason my computer won't let me.

i'd just like to put a few quotes here by this extraordinary man. quite a few years ago i had the chance to see the mlk center and the original ebeneezer church where he preached. i went there with my cousin brynn and her husband kalvin on our trip from chicago to florida. it is something i will never forget.

"An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity." --MLK Jr.

"he who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetuate it. he who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it." --MLK Jr.

"i have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character." --MLK Jr.

"i have decided to stick with love. hate is too great a burden to bear." --MLK Jr.

"life's most urgent question is: what are you doing for others?" --MLK Jr.

"never succumb to the tempation of bitterness." --MLK Jr.

"pity may represent little more than the impersonal concern which prompts the mailing of a check. but true sympathy is the personal concern which demands the giving of one's soul." --MLK Jr.

"everybody can be great. Because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. . .You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love." --MLK Jr.

let's all agree this day to be a little bit better. to fight injustice where we see it. to reach out.

earthquake in haiti - how we can help

2010-01-13T11:46:00.000-08:00

i'm sure that most of you know that haiti was hit yesterday with a 7.0 magnitude earthquake. haiti is the poorest nation in the western hemisphere. vinny and i have felt a strong desire to adopt from haiti for a while now. before this earthquake hit it was estimated that 50% of children did not live to see thier fifth birthday because of poverty and disease. think about that 50%!

the early reports are showing complete devastation in haiti from this earthquake. people who lived in shacks are now homeless. so many people are dead or missing. i know that particularly at this time in the world most of us don't have much extra money to give. if you find yourselves to be fortunate enough to give a little, i have a small list of organizations that are working directly with haiti.

the first is our church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. all donations are used for humanitarian purposes. the others are the red cross and then a link to organizations that have been checked out by cnn.

here you go:

http://tinyurl.com/ycq82od

http://www.redcross.org/

www.cnn.com/impact

if you do not find yourself able to give money at this time, perhaps you could donate blood. also, the greatest thing we can do is offer sincere prayers to our Heavenly Father who loves all of His children.

a request...

2009-12-18T15:26:00.000-08:00

you probably all know by now that we are waiting for an adoption of a child from china. for reasons that are not clear, adoptions from china have all but screached to a halt. we have waited for 3 years so far, and we have been told by our agency to be prepared to wait (possibly) many more years. vinny and i have been married for 9 1/2 years and can't wait to be parents.

we have decided that while we wait for our daughter from china we will also pursue other avenues of adding to our family. we are open to considering adoption from most other countries, and are also open to adopting domestically.

if any of you have experience with a particular agency that you would like to recommend, we welcome that with open arms. if you have friends who can recommend an agency please let us know. i'm feeling pretty confused about just where to start.

we are also hoping to get pregnant and would welcome your prayers for us on this matter.

thanks to everyone for all of your support! merry christmas and happy holidays!!!
love, megan and vinny

an attitude of gratitude

2009-11-26T11:56:00.000-08:00

vinny and i just read the article on lds.org called "an attitude of gratitude." it's awesome!

on this day of thanksgiving i just want to list a few of the blessings that i (megan) feel i have been blessed with lately.

first of all, i am so thankful for vinny and for the fun and silliness and strength that he brings to my life. he is such a hard worker and a wonderful husband. (not to mention he's sooooooo good-lookin'!) i count it my greatest blessing in life that i am married to him for eternity.

i am so very greatful for my parents and for the examples that they have set for me my entire life. they have provided me with unconditional love (even when i might not have been very lovable) and support. i am also blessed to have 2 wonderful brothers who set examples for me of how to be loving and spiritual. they have both married women that i am proud to call my sisters. and i am of course thankful for my nephews and my niece.

i am thankful for my two cats even though they are ususally very naughty.

i am thankful for my extended family - my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, and all of my cousins. they provide me with endless love and entertainment.

i am very thankful to know that my Heavenly Father loves me. i am thankful to know of the love that my Savior, Jesus Christ has for me. i am so blessed to have this as the foundation for my life.

and i am thankful for all of you, my friends. even if we only "see" each other on our blogs, or on facebook, i am thankful for your friendship.

so much to be thankful for!

2009-11-22T09:28:00.001-08:00

we all have so much to be thankful for. what are you thankful for?

blast off... new orleans!

2009-11-08T09:57:00.000-08:00

well, we've made it here safe and sound!

new orleans is hoping that hurricane ida is not going to hit here! they are expecting a lot of rain, two inches tomorrow. living where we live vinny and i do not even own an umbrella - guess we'll be buying a couple of those today.

yesterday was spent in traveling here, we left our house at about 3:30 am, and hopped our first plane at 6:20. i had the good fortune to sit next to a lady that kept throwing up, claiming it was "just her diabetes." um, pretty sure it was more than that - if i get sick can i sue her? ha. ha.

when we were waiting to board our plane in atlanta vinny wanted to walk around for a few minutes. well, i waited while they boarded first class, then they boarded the next group, then the next. still no vinny. finally they had boarded everyone, and i mean everyone and vinny was still no where to be seen. they were getting ready to shut the door when he comes wandering up with a giant ice cream cone in his hand! how do you like that?

after landing in new orleans and surviving the wild taxi ride to our airport we got to check out our cool hotel. it used to be a rice factory or something like that. the room is very pretty and best of all the giant bed is very comfy!

right now we are waiting to get our table at the famous brennan's - excited to eat "the world's best egg's benedict"!

we're really looking forward to exploring the city every evening after vinny's conference.

hopefully we'll update everyday and hopefully have some cool photos for you, too!

tag - you're it!!! 8 things...

2009-11-06T17:24:00.001-08:00

so, cammie tagged me on her blog so now i'm going to answer these questions (and then tag some of you)!!!

eight things i did today - not in order:

1. bought a strawberry cupcake for me, and a red velvet one for vinny

2. had lunch with my mom and dad. can i just take a minute to tell you all how incredibly awesome they are? seriously, they are so upbeat and positive and fun and funny and supportive and... wonderful! i realize how blessed i am and thank Heavenly Father every day for sending me to such a loving family.

3. returned a gigantic fleece sweatshirt we bought for vinny when we thought we was going to new york.

4. bought myself a zipper sweatshirt with a big star on the back (i'm a complete sucker for stuff with hearts or stars - i haven't outgrown being 9 yet) and a cute "twirly" white skirt that was only $4.99. i didn't even know it was on sale until i paid for it - yippee!!!

5. have done 3 loads of laundry so far and still have at least 2 more to go. sad? yes.

6. bought a present for vinny to try to convince him that he really does love country music.

7. made about a zillion lists of things to pack (because we are going to new orleans tomorrow!)

8. watched my man mow the lawn

eight things i'm looking forward to:

1. christmas

2. decorating for christmas

3. seeing family over the holidays

4. learning to cook (better)

5. learning how to sew on the sewing machine

6. our adoption (even though that may still be years away i am definitely looking forward to it)

7. meeting with an infertility specialist

8. going to new orleans with vinny!

eight favorite shows:

1. the office
2. 30 rock
3. the new adventures of old christine
4. everybody loves raymond
5. ace of cakes
6. laverne and shirley
7. sienfeld
8. ellen's talk show
9. gilmore girls... and of course,
10. i love lucy

eight favorite restaurants:

1. bruno's pizzaria
2. pf chang's
3. beni hana

i'm pretty open to restaurants, but those are my top three!

now i am tagging:

tiana
mindi
brynn
katie
angie
evonne
breclyn
beth

Bad Mood Rising

2009-09-26T14:07:00.001-07:00

i have to wonder if they had a secret camera filming us to get the idea for this episode.

a little gem from everybody loves raymond

2009-09-26T14:02:00.001-07:00

wish we would have done this at our wedding!!!

(sorry it's such poor quality... it's the only version i could find.)

some roly-poly little bat-face girl

2009-09-26T13:24:00.001-07:00

classic - i could watch chevy chase just chew gum. but watch paul simon twiddle his thumbs. beyond great!!!

enjoy...

awesomeness...

2009-09-24T18:57:00.001-07:00

two of my favorite girls. and one of my favorite songs. vinny and i used to listen to sarah a lot when we were dating.

please help me...... i'm going insane!!!

2009-09-24T13:49:00.000-07:00

i need help from you fellow bloggers out there.

i am trying to write a new post with a bunch of photos. i want the photos in a specific order, and i want to write things above or below each photo.

i can't seem to do this.

every time i add a photo it puts it at the top of my blog and i have to drag it down to where i want it to go. but then it moves my writing all around. how can i add a photo where i want it to go? and put writing above or below it?

am i the only one with this problem? am i making sense?

drum roll, please...

2009-08-17T23:16:00.000-07:00

here is the latest addition to our family! baby boy holladay (as we are calling him now) was born today, weighing in at 8lbs 2oz. he joins my brother scott, his wife michelle, and their two kiddos, micah and lauren. we are driving up to see them tomorrow. what a wonderful blessing!

mastering the art of french kissing... i mean cooking!

2009-08-15T22:33:00.000-07:00

so, vinny and i went and saw julie and julia today. more like, i said "i will see that stupid g.i. joe movie with you if you will see julie and julia with me." and off we went.

i am now filled with the desire to concoct a chocolate souffle of some sort, or at the very least, poach an egg.

i adored the movie. i adore meryl streep. but the way she played julia child was just luminous. the flashes in her eyes, her infectuous laughter... i wanted to climb into the movie and hug her. mostly, i think that's because in her quiet moments meryl as julia reminded me of my grandma. her playfulness, her determination, but mostly her happy confidence in herself.

the movie actually inspired me. maybe not to write a book, but to find something that i love to do. and do it.

maybe i'll start with poaching an egg...

let us remember...

2009-05-25T08:07:00.000-07:00

as we go about celebrating today, let us all take some time to remember why this day is so special. whatever our beliefs are about the war, memorial day is a day to celebrate the lives of those who were lost defending our freedoms and our country for generations.

i want to take just a moment to remember one young man who was killed in iraq. mark carter was a few years younger than i. we went to school and church together. he was a member of the navay seals and was killed in iraq. losing mark really put a face to this war for me. we can debate these wars forever, but the truth is that really good people are giving their lives for our country. may they never be forgotten.

"This Nation Will Remain The Land Of The Free Only So Long As It Is The Home Of The Brave." -- Elmer Davis

huge huge huge news!!!

2009-04-28T14:56:00.001-07:00

yesterday was the two-year anniversary of logging our paperwork in with Chinese Children Adoption International. today we found out that the chinese government accepted our application!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

adopting from china is an extremely long process. we have been pursuing this adoption for over 3 years now. being approved by the chinese government is HUGE because now all we need to do (besides re-newing our US government papers and doing another homestudy, etc.) is kick back and wait to be matched to our baby girl!!! that will probably take over another year, but this is an enormous hurdle we just jumped over. we were notified months ago that our paperwork would probably be flagged and cause a problem in the chinese government. but it did not!!! this is just a miracle!

we have passed inspection!!!

we have been accepted!!!

china, here we come!!! (well, here we come in 2010 - which is our 10th wedding anniversary!)

we are so thankful for our blessings from our loving Father in Heaven! i don't think it was just coincidence that we were accepted on the second anniversary of our LID (log-in date). it think it was a little wink from above!

God is good!

yoo-hoo!!!

2009-04-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

hi there everyone!!!

we have returned from our self-imposed blogging exile.

our neighborhood is having a community garage sale next month. we have set a goal to go through all of our junk and all of the boxes we never unpacked after moving here. (yes, we moved in 3 years ago. and yes, our garage is still full of boxes.) i want to get rid of tons of stuff and make some money...

i'll let you know what kind of crazy stuff we come across.

we went to las vegas again last weekend. carmella (vinny's mom) took us. it was the first anniversary of vinny's dad's passing and we thought it would be good to head out of town. it was her first trip to vegas ever... i think she thought it was a den of sin. but she liked the fountain at the bellagio and the bakery at the paris.

here i am at the bellagio:

the big 1-0! happy birthday mason!

2008-10-18T14:53:00.001-07:00

happy 10th birthday mason durst! we are so proud of you and love you to pieces!!!

where oh where did we go?

2008-10-15T11:33:00.001-07:00

where can you see all of the following places in a 3 day period?

an italian gondolier...

the eiffel tower...

a fantastic water display...

a tropical oasis?...

and the washington monument?

LAS VEGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we just love going to las vegas any chance we get.

happy birthday tiny ty!!!

2008-10-04T15:27:00.000-07:00

happy birthday to our favorite tiny guy!!!!

too long

2008-08-29T13:52:00.000-07:00

well, well, well. here we are again. just wanted to let everyone know that we are still here, alive and kicking. scott and michelle are here visiting with my niece and nephew, lauren and micah. alex got married last weekend. that's right! he got married...

i will post photos of scott's visit and alex's wedding asap.

just wanted to say hi to all of you out there in blogger land.

love, megan

misc comments

2008-06-28T11:01:00.000-07:00

It was so great to see Grover and Katie and their 2 cute kids, Julie Anne and William. Wasn't that a great picture of them in the previous post??? Loved it! It was such a wonderful visit and I hope to do that again. Good friends are hard to come by and they are truly great friends. I served with Grover twice on the mission. He is a man of faith and guts. That makes for a very unstoppable combination. I hope that Megan and I get to meet them often.

This morning I rode the motorcycle back to Mom's house. It was a nice trip.
I must admit that I have been branded. It's true. It's a rite-of-passage. It's initiation. My right leg rubbed up against the hot muffler and i have a huge pipe tattoo. It's a bad one; the skin has already blistered and is ready to peel off. Oh well. Now it won't happen anymore; I'd say I've learned my lesson!

Mom and I met with her lawyer this morning, John Mcelyea. We find him to be a good man, of good character. I am sure Dad would approve of him. One thing I really liked about him was that he wouldn't even venture a guess or opinion regarding some questions I asked him that were outside his realm of specific legal niche. I think most egotistical lawyers or people in general, would take those questions and start sounding really intelligent by throwing out their opinions. I wonder if I do that sometimes, probably more than I should. He didn't- and I like that about him. I was a bit scared when I was selecting a lawyer, because we had options and were not sure whom to choose. He was recommended to me and then I did some research on him. Anyway, this was our first meeting with him and we were impressed. His staff has been exceptional so far and we hope all things continue to go as well. He made some very interesting discoveries about my Father's accident during his on-going investigation. I don't want to share them all here on this blog but those of you who are close to us, or care to call, I will share them with you. Suffice to say, the original police report drafted at the scene was not all that accurate. But I have great understanding. I know that the man that hit my Father had absolutely no intention to do so. While I am saddened by my Father's passing I am grateful that I feel no anger or animosity towards the man driving the car that struck him.

Dad's number was up. An accident happened. End of story. I wish it were different. But it isn't. The past is a lifeless, indestructible brick wall that is deaf, blind, and numb to all screaming, head-banging, and pleading. It travels on at 1041 miles per hour, mowing down the present with impunity. No helmet, no roll-bar, no seatbelt is going to save or secure you from it. See that? Here it comes....Did you see it? Did it blow your hair in your face?

The Parhams

2008-06-28T04:05:00.000-07:00

Last night I rode the motorcycle over to my old companion's house (Elder Parham). He was an awesome companion when we served together in Salt Lake City. Dad knew him, too.

He and his wife, Katie, live in Titusville. They have 2 really cute kids! We stayed up all night talking about mission experiences and playing Pass The Pigs (which I totally won).

Then I crashed on their couch. It was a great night.

Katie wass in the Army and is now in the ready reserves. She served in Kuwait and is now keeping her husband in line.

mom, elbows, artillery, and other things that go bump in the night

2008-06-27T04:56:00.000-07:00

This is a typical morning.
I walk in to check on mom and she is sleeping on the floor.
I had placed a picture of it on this blog but she has since made me remove it. She doesn't want any incriminating evidence posted.
It makes me want to cry. I mean really- the bed cost almost $2,000 and it is rarely used!
Chances are she fell out of bed from spasms and then slept on the floor for the rest of the night.
Can you blame me for wanting her to live down the street?
To her it is just a typical morning and she tries to be positive; she might say something like she prefers to sleep on the floor.
Yeesh.

Megan is probably having the best sleep of her life right now. I have this habit of elbowing her in the head during the night. We had to get the largest bed possible so we could have more distance between her head and my elbow. But I can't seem to help it. I scoot over in the middle of the night so I be close to her and then BLAMO. Maybe it's a Disanza thing that we have problems in our sleep. Mom falls out of bed and sleeps on the floor. Dad wouldn't sleep unless a movie was on, and I elbow my wife like she's a punching bag. What is wrong with us???? I need to either get nerf elbow pads or some wrestling head gear for Megan.

Dad was very funny to watch at night. He always wanted you to watch a movie with him. It would be one of his favorite movies, like Dirty Dancing, or The Cutting Edge, or some western flick. And he would sit there on the couch for the first 5 minutes and then his eyes would close, and then his head would start to fade backwards, and then SMACK! His head would hit the wall behind him, which would wake him up, which would enable him to watch the movie for another 5 minutes before the whole process would repeat. It was a vicious cycle- really. And there were these grease spots on the wall from where his bald head would hit it. They never did repaint those spots in Jersey before they moved. I wonder if they are still there today. Dad could sleep anywhere. He was a tanker.

If he could can sleep on the back of a Main Battle Tank on a tank range with main guns firing less than 100 yards away, flares shooting up every 5 minutes, and the 50 cal whizzing down range like a red laser then you can understand how he could sleep anywhere...and why he was half deaf. I remember one day he snuck me and Sergeant Rambolo's son onto the range at Fort Indian Town Gap. What a memory. I can never forget it. Yeah- some kids go to Great Adventure, some kids go to Disneyland, my Dad took me to a tank range. I was probably 9 or 10 at the time and Dad had me completely dressed in camouflage just like him- but I wouldn't know why until later. Dad was my hero. He was Company Commander at the time and his company had all their tanks on the range and his men had to practice and qualify. Later in life Dad would run the whole battalion and the range but that’s another story.... The tanks I saw were before the Abrams came out. They were the older M60 model tanks with the big luggage rack on top. But the guns were still powerful and still loud. The bolt on the main gun tube, inside the tank, was bigger than I was. It looked just like the one of my dad's hunting rifle, only a heck of a lot bigger and a heck of a lot louder. The tank commander would yell commands like "gunner target!" and the other fuy would yell something back and Dad wuold yell "fire!" and then round would go off and the end of the main gun tube would explode with a fiery blast like in the movies and the force of the round was so fierce that it would literally cause the tank to jump backwards by one track tread. I remember studying it because I was fascinated by it. A little while later that tank would be many feet behind the line from where it started. But what was even more fun was the 50 cal on the top of the tank. The gunner would be perched on top of the tank, just his helmeted head and biceps exposed and he would hold the gun with 2 hands, there was a grip on each side of the gun and one grip had a trigger. There was an endless string of thick bullets that had these clips on them that connected them together. And every 5th bullet in the chain had a red tip on it. Dad explained that as these red-tipped bullets went down range that their red tips glowed from the heat. Since the gun fired so fast it looked like a constant red laser so the gunner knew exactly where he was shooting. The gun fired so fast that the clips from the bullets going into the chamber would fly off and it seemed like a torrential rainstorm of clips flying off the top of the tank. And amid it all there would be these parachute flares that someone kept shooting up in the sky. A parachute flare is a glowing piece of magnesium that is shot up into the sky and it burns so hot and bright that it light up the whole range. As it descends from the sky it has a rip-stop nylon parachute bove it so it slows the descent and allows for maximum time aloft to provide light for as long as possible. You could probably read a newspaper under it. A year later our neighbor had invited us to his 4th of July party and was bragging about his huge stockpile of fireworks. He was really laying it on thick. Finally Dad went into the house and emerged with the silver tube. I knew exactly what he was doing. And with a pop of his first he sent a parachute flare over South Bound Brook. It didn’t take long for the neighbor to drop his cigarette...or for the sirens to start blaring either! In hindsight, it probably wasn't that smart to send a burning piece of magnesium over a heavily populated town but hey- I just like to think Dad was being patriotic! Of course, if anyone in town wanted to wash their car, rad the paper, or do anything else for 5 minutes, they sure didn't need a flashlight! And a few years after that Dad let off an artillery simulator in the Bradshaws front lawn on New Years Eve. Lets just say your banging pots and pans can't hold a candle to an artillery simulator. And it was probably helpful for Ralph Bradshaw, you know, in case if he needed a big hole in his front yard and was too tired to dig one himself. I could go on and on about my father's little "treats" for us. I mean- try playing capture the flag in the boy scouts when Dad pops red smoke in the middle of the field. Sure, it was a heck of a lot of fun for us; I'm sure the people trying to drive down the road nearby who couldn't see more than 3 feet in front of them through this red fog weren't too happy but it sure was fun for us!

Oh the memories...... I sure miss him. He was slightly irreverent, slightly off kilter, you never knew what he was going to do next but you knew it was going to be fun!

Then I remember some high ranking official was coming by in his jeep and Dad yelled at me to head into the trees! I realized why he had me wear camoflauge. Thinking back, I am pretty sure 9 or 10 year olds were not allowed on military tank ranges. Maybe it was something about liability? But really, what was it all that dangerous?

Geico

2008-06-27T04:40:00.000-07:00

The incessant commercials are one thing.
But this is going TOO FAR!
I use USAA for my car insurance.
I've been a member for 16 years.
I'm NOT going to switch to Geico!

So leave me alone you English psycho lizard freak!

...They're everwhere! ...They're following me! Its like they're a plague of Egypt or something!

...I think maybe I forgot to take my pills this morning.

note to Megan- look above the dryer

The flaming O

2008-06-27T04:20:00.000-07:00

Question: What do 2 flamingos do as soon as they get married???
Answer: They put 2 plastic Italians on their front lawn.

I had placed a pink flamingo on my front lawn once....and Megan made me take it down. She just doesn't understand my heritage. She doesn't understand us Italians. She must not have spent enough time on the East Coast. I mean really, I just had ONE flamingo on the lawn. That’s nothing. Mom’s house has THREE. And here is a picture of the neighbor’s house down the street. Can you count how many flamingos grace their beautiful yard??? How fun!!!

So perhaps my problem was that I only placed one flamingo on my lawn; I didn't provide any room for negotiation. When I come home I will bring 20 and we can negotiate from there.

They are so wonderful.
I want to name them.

The motorcycle hospital

2008-06-25T09:14:00.000-07:00

Dad's bike is sick. Sad but true. The left turn signal has not worked for a while now. Dad did not get it fixed but meant to. I don't want to mess around with it not working, since I am not as experienced as my Dad at riding. I took it to the bike shop he uses.

Quick Draw Motorcycles
728 Ballough Rd Daytona Beach, FL 32114
(386) 253-0900

It took me a while to find the place. It is a hole-in-the-wall. It is locate just past the fancy, modern, well-decorated Harley Davidson dealership and then just after the big motorcycle repair shops. As I pulled up to it it made me smile. I remember as a kid Nicole and I would go get pizza at this place where they actually threw the pizza dough with one hand and a smoked a cigarette with the other. I think the name of the shop may have been tattooed on the guy's forearm. Led Zeppelin music was so loud you had to shout your order and the grease that came off the pizza was 10 weight 40. It was not pretty. It was not comfortable. But the pizza was the best in town! And so I pull up to this place....One bay door, small operation. Two large dogs in the shop, motorcycle parts everywhere, the air was filled with grease and smelled of WD40. The owner, Mike, wore a ripped muscle shirt baring his biceps and tattoos, and greeted me with a stiff handshake and a smile, remembered my father vividly, and remembered his bike exactly. This was my father’s kind of bike shop. I can totally see why he would bring his bike here. It made perfect sense. If I have any other issues with the bike I am sure I will be bringing it back here. This is my Dad's kind of shop.

They are working on it right now. I am sitting acorss the street at Captains Jacks Restaurant. It's located at the marina. I am sitting at a window watching the sailboats go by.

Somewhere in my stomach there is a plate of fried shrimp and onion rings trying to get out. Thanks, Captain. From now on the only Captain I am dealing with is Captain Crunch.

...I wish Mike owned a pizzeria as well as a motorcycle shop.

Later- ;-)

Scooters vs. the man card

2008-06-25T08:27:00.000-07:00

Okay. So there I am in the Motorcycle Riding Class a months ago at the Honda Riding Center. My good buddy, and motorcycle police officer, Nathan recommended I go there. The whole group of us in class is sitting around tables during our break and we are looking at some of Honda's motorcycle brochures. Call me a moron but I like the scooters. The Silver Wing is this really big scooter, goes on the highway, is pretty fast, etc. I like it. And so I blurt out, "This Silverwing is really cool, I would like one of THOSE!" The multiple conversions that were scattering around the room seemed to come to a decrescendo. Heads turned in my direction until all was quiet. I was the center of attention. All eyes were on my as I held the Silverwing scooter page open in the brochure. I quietly asked the question, "I would have to surrender my man card if I get one of these, huh?" It was like I asked the most obvious question imaginable. They all quickly affirmed, "YES" and then turned back to their conversations. And the women in the room looked at me like I just became infected with some horrible contagious virus. Haven't felt that way since high school.

Please place a comment and make your oppinion kown if a guy would have to surrender his "man card" or at least forfeit some "man points" if he rides a highway-legal scooter.

And so today, I'm riding down International Speedway Blvd, about a half mile north of the Daytona Speedway. Dad's pipes are loud, the bike is smooooth, I'm wearing black leather boots, black leather jacket, Oakley shades, I'm doing pretty good (the only thing I'm missing is a pair of large biceps and some tattoos). Whenever other bikers pass you or you pass other bikers they extend their hand in polite wave. It's like you are in a brotherhood. But this guy comes up to a stop light. He is on a......on a......a Honda Silverwing Scooter. My first reaction was to smile and check it out because I think it looks so cool but then I remembered I must suppress such urges and feelings. I went to extend my hand to wave but wait.....do we wave to those people? The guy was wearing a half open Hawaiian shirt, shorts, and sandals on that clutchless wonder. Maybe he was from another country? Maybe he didn't get the memo? And so I was stuck at my stoplight. What should I do? Pretend I don't see him. Purposely look the other way? Look down on him? Rev my throttle so any thoughts he might even have in that scooterish brain of his is drowned out by the sound of pure awesomeness?

Then I thought of my dad. Hmmm.... What would he do?

And I realized that it takes a very secure male individual to be the first one on the dance floor to do the Electric slide, the Macarena, admit that he still listens to his Milli Vanilla tape, and frequently watches Dirty Dancing like it is part of his monthly schedule.

My thoughts seemed in sync with the glug glug BLAST glug glug COUGH of the low-idling Harley underneath me. Brotherhood is something that was far more general than specific for my old man. The only thing that would keep you out of it were violating 3 simple rules: He wouldn't tolerate rudeness, he would never tolerate a bully, and he would never tolerate anything that encroached upon the rights of others. So long as you didn't violate any of those rules you were in the good graces of Jim Disanza. You could be black, white, yellow, red, purple, gay, straight, crazy, or a complete nerd and Jim Disanza would extend his hand.

Dad would surely wave to Mr. Hawaiian Tropic on the scooter. And so I popped the peg a half click up to neutral, I slowly removed my left hand from the clutch, lowered it along my leg, and slowly extended it in a sign of peace. And with that the light turned green, I stomped on first, and thundered on to the rest of my life.

note to Megan: it's in a large pot.

These boots are made for walkin'

2008-06-23T05:50:00.001-07:00

I purchased a pair of boots for this trip. They are made by a brand that makes motorcycle gear because they are perfect for wearing on a motorcycle- they have great tread, hard nose, and they cover my ankles. These are the boots in the picture (Cee Cee insisted on modeling in the photo-shoot, too). I am not used to wearing boots or any kind of shoe that is not a “croc”. As a real estate appraiser I wear crocs every day because they are easy to slip off when I go into people’s homes and they are dang comfortable to wear everywhere. Oh, and I can throw them in the dishwasher when they get dirty. And so I find myself trying to get used to these boots. …And that brings me to a story….. My Dad has worn all sorts of boots over the years. I vividly remember him lacing up his combat boots, even as a child. He had this way of “speed lacing” them so that at the very end of threading them he would yank on the laces hard and they would all tighten. It was a procedure that I found it really interesting as a kid. He ALWAYS polished his boots to a liquid shine before leaving. He also had tanker boots that did not have laces. He had hiking boots. He had snow boots. He was fastidious about footwear; I won’t even go into stories about his sneakers or church shoes! And then he had ski boots, which is what this story is about. When I was in 5th grade (and Nicole in 6th) Dad volunteered to chaperone his school’s ski trips. By doing this he received free ski lift tickets to “Shawnee Mountain” in the Poconos. We loved going up there. Now having been to Uncle Peter’s “Sierra Summit” in the Sierra Nevadas of California I know that Shawnee Mountain was a mere bunny slope of a ski resort but it was all we had at the time. It was our world of skiing and it contained some of the coolest experiences of my youth including, which makes it real special to me, some positive memories of my sister and I. My father skiied more than Nicole and I because he would go with the school as well. He felt he should get his own equipment since he was skiing so often. And so he went to the local ski store, where we had been renting equipment, and purchased skis and boots. They were very fond of Dad, as you can imagine. Dad had formed a great relationship with them there and may have even taught the owner how to work-out (I don’t remember exactly). But I do remember that Dad got a red pair of Dolomite ski boots. Not too long thereafter we were on the slopes and Dad had a problem with one of his boots. It broke! A rivet had completely come out of the boot. Rats! We had to call the night short and head home. Dad went to the ski shop and showed them the boot, requesting a full refund. They don’t give refunds for boots and it looked like there must have been some foul play on Dad’s part. The guy who inspected the boot went over it again and again in disbelief. He’d look at the boot and then look at Dad and then look at the boot again. He had Dad pull up his pants and flex his calves. He gave Dad a full refund. Dad’s calves muscles get so huge when he flexes them that he literally blew the rivets out the side of the boot! When Dad realized this he was no longer angry or upset in any way; he was proud of the boots destruction. …Another casualty of Jim Disanza’s morning calf lifts.

Note to Megan: behind a pillow

Change of Plans

2008-06-22T21:26:00.000-07:00

Here is a good example of the position I find myself in:

You come home from work and run upstairs to take a shower from a hard day’s labor and you soon find that you are dizzy, your eyes are burning and everything is blurry, and you feel like you are hyperventilating. Which problem do you address first??? Neither. You need to run out of there as fast as you can because your house is on fire.

I have come out here with the express purpose of completing this road trip in an effort to deal with my father’s passing and sort of “regroup” myself. But what I have discovered since my arrival is more akin to “the house being on fire”. Despite how badly I want to go on this tribute ride I cannot help but think that my father would much rather me stay here for a week and put this fire out. The bike trip is only what I want do, but not necessarily what I need to do. I suppose I ought to follow the words of the great primary song “Do what is right” when it sings, “Do what is right, let the consequence follow”.

I suppose I can ride to the beach and around town with John and Kevin and some of Dad’s buddies during the week while tending to matters of greater importance at home here and ship the bike out to California at the end of the week. Perhaps I can reflect on Dad as we do paperwork…and fix he spigot ….and fix the sprinklers….and deal with insurance companies…..and take mom to her doctor’s appointments…. and snake the tub in the bathroom…..etc

I hope that you will all continue to read this blog despite the changes in plans. I will continue to blog each day and event, with pictures of his local friends and places of interest.

The story of this post is not about Dad- it is about Mom. I just can’t help it. Mom just came up to me a few minutes ago as I was typing and I read some of the previous posts to her. What happened after I finished the last story explained A LOT. The following dialogue ensued:

Mom: (half asleep and tapping on my laptop) I need to get one of these.
Vinny: Why?
Mom: So that I can take it with me and communicate.
Vinny: ??????? (she has a desktop computer)
Mom: You know so I can take it with me doctor’s offices and things and email. I want to keep up with the 20th century.
Vinny: Yeah- it’s actually the 21st century now, mom.
Mom: Oh.

Disowned

2008-06-21T21:18:00.000-07:00

Tonight I learned that my mother and I are no longer welcome in one of our relative’s homes. It is sad. It is the third member of my father's family to disown us since my father's passing. It is very difficult to bear. I have spent hours wearing out the front walk outside and consoling my mother, who was already disowned from her own family about 30 years ago. This particular member of the family has not even spoken to us or let us know of any shortcomings- they simply sent a note. My mom and I are heartbroken. I can't help but wonder what I have done to cause such a problem. I don't know if I am the cause of this or not. I feel sick. The kind of sick that doesn't go away with pepto. The kind that eats at you and is like a parasitic thought that takes over all your other thoughts. The kind that keeps you up at night and makes you second guess everything you have ever done.

It is amazing how absolute decisions can easily stem from hurtful comments made in anger or indignation which stem from misunderstandings. My friend John said it is like squeezing toothpaste; it is so easy to squeeze it out of the tube, but so hard to get it back in. While I hope for remediation and reconciliation from the problems that beset this person, I wonder if that toothpaste will ever get back in the tube. I know I have said some hurtful things in the past, at various times in my life to various people. Most of the things I regret saying were said in my anger and when I wasn’t being very rational. But all of my regret can't put that toothpaste back into the tube, can't take those words back, and, in the end, I had to deal with the consequences of my actions. While some relationships can be repaired well enough through quick remediation, tender care, and maintenance, others wither and die from years of neglect and desertion that can be caused by those hurtful comments. We have probably all seen that in some form or another throughout our lives. I know my father was always an advocate for unity. I can recall many feuds in my family, some pretty severe, where my father refused to take a side. He was an advocate for peace and unity and believed cool heads could prevail and misunderstandings could be rectified through well-intended and focused conversation. He was very wise in that regard. He kept his cool. He has made many unpopular decisions in his life, some of which caused rifts, but none which caused any significant destruction. Other people could have made the same decisions and met with severe conflict, but dad just had a way of communicating with others that seemed to be an art. He kept a cool head. He believed everyone was reasonable and just needed to understand, and if they didn't agree with him, they could agree that he believed it and they could still be friends. That’s why he had one of the greatest leadership traits of all- he could tell someone to go to hell and make them want to go. He was that good at handling conflict and dealing with people. He liked many people and was liked by many people. It was hard not to like him. Even people, who didn’t agree with him, still liked him! I think he could have been an excellent hostage negotiator if he ever wanted to pursue law enforcement.

I remember his negotiation of “forkfuls” of vegetables with Nicole at the dinner table when she was very young. They would negotiate! It was a very emotional matter for Nicole. Dad understood that she hated to eat them and she understood that he had to insist on it. They had an understanding between them. They met in the middle and I think those negotiations created a type of trust bond between the two of them that continued for the rest of their lives. It was about respect for each other. The negotiations and understandings between them started with "forkfuls" at the dinner table but later on in life it was about how late she could stay up, dating rules, driving, etc. But it really was no different.

Let me share another, much larger and grandier story along similar lines-

I recall one story which my father had told me. I asked him to put it on tape for me about ten years ago, and he did. I have since lost the tape (nice, huh?). I will tell it to you as best I can remember. My father had recently joined the National Guard (within 5 years). I don't recall how long he had been in or what his rank was at the time but he was stationed in a barrack as the leader of a platoon. Each man had a bunk and footlocker. There was one soldier in the group who was from the back woods. His name was ____ Wolf (I know his first name but won't say it). He didn't bathe or have any form of acceptable hygiene. He was not liked by the men at all. He kept to himself most of the time. He was very unpopular. The men treated him badly. They gave him a GI shower which involved using a firehose and a painful scrub-brush. It was not something that would probably be tolerated in the Army today (or would it?). Suddenly Mr. Wolf started volunteering for ammo detail- which was one of the worst details you could get and involved scrounging around the ammo dump. The last night of their training the men were to go out on maneuvers. They only use blank ammunition when they are on maneuvers. One of the men mentioned to my Dad that he thought Mr. Wolf was hoarding live ammunition in his foot locker. Dad didn't have much time to figure this out as the men were leaving. Dad went and confronted Mr Wolf at his footlocker. Mr Wolf refused to let Dad look in his footlocker. (Invading a soldiers footlocker is a serious breach of privacy and carries significant penalties). But my father had an entire platoon of men under his command, for which he was responsible. He weighed his options. Despite the penalties, my father insisted on searching the footlocker. Mr. Wolf refused and blocked the locker with his body and called for my Dad's C/O. My Dad physically removed Mr. Wolf from the foot-locker (my father was a competing power-lifter at the time) and opened it up to reveal strings of live ammunition that Mr. Wolf was planning on using that evening to exact revenge on his fellow soldiers. Can you believe that? I don't think my father was reprimanded for his actions but I know he wasn't hailed for them, either. I learned a lot from that story, the least of which is that psychological disorders and live ammunition make for a vicious cocktail. My Dad found himself in a position where he had to make a decision, however unpopular it may be. He made it, he stuck to it. I wonder if people would have felt differently about him if he had found nothing out of the ordinary in that foot locker. Would that have made any difference at all?? So many people in life I think are quick to accuse, to send hurtful remarks, or to cast judgment, but how many of them are the ones standing in front of the footlocker? It is pretty hard to understand why people feel the way they feel and do the things they do without being in their shoes. Likewise how can we really comprehend what was going through Mr. Wolf's mind???? Understanding is one of the most important aspects of communication.

Drastic actions cause drastic consequences and they are not easily undone. Can you imagine what would have happened if Dad did not intercede? If he just figured no one was crazy enough to do that? If he figured he didn't want to get on the C/O's radar and just decided to cower away and leave the whole thing alone? If he had, it would have been understood and he would not have been faulted. Obviously we are all glad for what he did. He saved his own life and the life of his men. He probably also saved Mr. Wolf's life and I am sure he got the help he needed after that encounter. I think a lot of these types of actions must go unadvertised through the media. I think the Military takes care of its own problems. I have heard other stories from my father as he was on tank ranges and in drills that would have been excellent fodder for CNN primetime but instead it only received only casual conversation at the dinner table over a large cheese pizza and rootbeer.

The moral of this post:

We should not be so quick to create a tear bigger than we can mend.

Note to Megan: look in your old desk- the one Alex scratched his name in (and ruined it forever)

IHOP....Dad's favorite breakfast place

2008-06-21T13:18:00.000-07:00

This morning Mom, Cecil (mom's friend and close neighbor) and I returned my super-fast Dodge Caliber rental car and then went to breakfast at IHOP. Dad loved IHOP. IF you ever asked him where he wanted to eat, he would always say "IHOP", and then make funny quips, grunts, and cliché comments expressing his love for their breakfasts. His love for IHOP stems from his younger years, and I know this because he shared these experiences with us each time we went out to eat at IHOP. It was great because each time we got a different story, a different experience. Dad was the oldest of 5. His siblings were: Dorothy, Wayne, Johnny, and Michael. Every Sunday Grandpa (aka: "Chief") and Grandpa would take the kids out for breakfast/brunch AFTER church. The deal was that if you went to church then you got a big breakfast. And whomever they brought were included in the bunch. I can only imagine the Disanza CLAN taking over a local diner or restaurant. Surely it was loud, significantly irreverent, and I am sure there was a LOT of food. I know Dad had such fond memories of these Sunday gatherings because he talked about it so much. He even talked about how he would drive all the way from college on Sunday mornings, with a girl by his side (hopefully my mom) and sneak in at the end of mass so they could join the group for breakfast. He loved getting together with the family. He loved his parents and brothers and sisters. It was a very diverse group, and they were all somehow related to or good friends of a DISANZA. Anyone who knew anything about the family knew that The Chief buys breakfast after church. And so here we were today, at IHOP, chowing down on Dad's favorite grub. I inhaled the strawberry stuffed french toast.

I swear they must put crack in it...because it is highly addictive!

The fastest car in the world

2008-06-21T07:47:00.000-07:00

As I strolled up to my black Dodge Caliber rental car at the Orlando Airport and fiddled with the single key on the key ring, my mind wandered back to a distant and funny memory. I remember some years ago my friends Tony and Bri Litster pulling up in front of me in a blue convertible PT cruiser. It was a homecoming reunion at the college we all attended (and where we all met our spouses- Tony+Bri, Me+Megan). Tony looks at me and says "what's the fastest, most maneuverable car in the world?". I thought for a moment about various Ferrari's and Lamborghini's and Tony, seeing me taking him seriously, shakes his head and says "a rental" and then slammed his foot into the accelerator. I saw things happen in that PT cruiser that should never happen....ever.

Anyway, I was a bit more tame with the Caliber but it was a fun memory.

I recall when I was about 15 years old my Dad, Nicole, and I were in his Honda Civic. It was a very boxey civic- and I eventually was given it as a gift when I got off the mission. Megan mocks me for ever having driven it- I won't say here what she referred to it as- but suffice to say she takes great pleasure in mocking me incessantly whenever we see that type model civic on the road. Ha Ha. Back to the story- so we were in the civic in the church parking lot one evening after our youth group met. Dad was going to give Nicole some driving lessons. Dad, who could hardly drive worth beans, was going to teach my sister, who had the hand eye coordination of a rock, how to drive a car- at night- using a car that was a stickshift. Nicole couldn't even shift a bicycle and that's no lie. But that’s not what was really stupid, what was really stupid was that I sat in the backseat during this comedy of errors! Nicole, and most people, should obviously learn to drive on an automatic an then graduate to a stickshift. And so Nicole attempted to do a whole lot of things at once and I saw this tree coming at me very very fast....the tree wasn't slowing, in fact, the tree was accelerating at a very fast rate, almost like the civic was a rental or something. Dad did the only thing he could do, he yanked on the emergency brake so hard he nearly pulled it out of the floor (which he has done previously mind you- back in his power lifting days). For the next 4 weeks the members of our church could see these long skid marks in the parking lot leading right up to a birch tree. They were baffled. Nicole did eventually learn to drive a stickshift and she became a very good driver but I think she learned more from Mom than she ever learned from Dad. And I laugh about that because I went through the same thing with the same car! Mom was the real driver instructor. But it sure was funny trying to learn from Dad.

sidenote: It took me all of about 3 minutes to teach my wife how to drive a stickshift and after 3 minutes she drove it better than me (and still does).

note to Megan: look by the wrapping paper.

Alien at Orlando

2008-06-21T05:26:00.000-07:00

Is it just me or does the ceiling of the Orlando airport look like it was taken from the movie "Alien"? I keep waiting for snot to drip from the ceiling and some wicked black creature to jump out and eat me or worse yet- jump out of my stomach. Dad and I loved the Alien series. They are usually on TV sometime every month. I think Dad had a closet crush on Sigorney... Then again, didn't we all?? And before you women judge us, remember- we guys know about your secret crushes on Patrick Swayze when you saw Dirty Dancing for the first out of 50 times.

Bored in an airport

2008-06-20T16:11:00.000-07:00

Here I am. In the airport. You know- in those tiny seats all lined up in a row. They are like training seats for the airplane. They are "getting you ready" for how it is really going to be. Is that my armrest... or yours?

When I got here I stood in line waiting for the "check in" lady to call me. I stood there for 5 minutes knowing I was the next in line. Finally the lady came over to me and invited my to the counter where she told me I could use the self-check-in kiosk. It was like being in a grocery store and a checker coming up to you and saying I am ready for you to check yourself out now! It didn't take long for me to realize that I didn't not have to have waited in line at all and there were plenty available. I guess I am a bit of an old fashioned traveler.
As the kiosk sent me through the screens I finally got to a point where I could select my seat. I picked a window seat. Then the screen asked me if I wanted a seat upgrade. Hmmmm. So I looked into it. They are offering me "economy plus" and advertising 5 more inches of leg room for $40.00 per flight (I have 2 flights to get to Orlando). That's 80 bucks for 5 inches! That's $16 per inch. I was glad I am not tall. I am amazed at how we have reduced ourselves to adding surplus prices on seats with 5 more inches of leg room. Just ask for the exit row!

I went through security. As I walked through the metal detectors the TSA agent informed me that "I had been selected by my airline for a more thorough screening". Great, I thought. Why couldn't they select me for first class? Why could they select me to come to the front of the lines, why couldn't they select me to get free flyer miles? No, instead I got the full screening treatment. You know the drill.

My father in an airport is very interesting. Airports are full of escalators and moving-walkways, and these items are the antithesis of Jim Disanza. Using an escalator showed weakness and laziness! He thought they were horrible. I do remember him showing me in a mall how he could go up the down escalator and get a good "burn" in his quads by the time he got up it. I, of course, had to follow. I was accepted by my father but was surely mocked by any peer that saw me. Dad in an airport. He was amazed at how fast he could run or climb when he was on a people-mover or escalator. You couldn't stand there! You had to move! move move move. That was my old man. He had to be in motion, had to be going somewhere, had to be on his way, and it rarely mattered where he was going so long as he did it very fast and got a good burn out of it.

The Jim Disanza Tribute Ride

2008-06-20T16:05:00.000-07:00

For the next 10 days this blog will be pretty much dedicated the my wanderings in the wilderness. I am flying to Florida, picking up Dad's Harley and some of his ashes, and riding them accross the country. It is sure to be an adventure! I have invited a lot of friends and family members to read this blog. I hope to not dissapoint. Please feel free to leave any comments you want. Go ahead and post comments for all to see!

where does time go?

2008-05-30T10:24:00.000-07:00

it has been exactly 5 months since our last post. a lot has happened during this time.

i don't really know how to post this on a blog, but on April 14th we got a phone call from vinny's mom saying that jim, vinny's dad, hadn't come home and it was getting late. a little while later we were called and told that he had been in a bicycle accident and was life-flighted to the hospital. we jumped on a plane about 5 hours later (thanks to my mom and dad coming over to help us pack and drive us to the airport). we arrived in florida the next morning and drove straight to his parents' house. we were filled in on the information they had so far - jim was hit by a car while riding his bicycle and he was in intensive care, in a coma, and on a respirator.

we spent the next 5 days at the hospital every waking hour by his bedside. on april 19th jim passed away. we had a beautiful funeral for him at the church and it was estimated that over 400 people attended the services. during the week jim was hospitalized we prayed and prayed for a miracle. when it became evident that this was no longer possible the hospital opened its doors to visitors. hundreds and hundreds of people came to visit him. jim was a very popular p.e. teacher at a local middle school. his accident and subsequent hospitalization were the lead story almost every night on the news. there were many many news articles printed about him.

there are many wonderful stories to tell about him, and i am sure that we will share some here. but for now, we just want to thank our friends and family for their prayers during this difficult time. we feel the love of the Lord and our Heavenly Father and have felt the healing comfort of the Holy Ghost.

we love all of you and again thank you for your help during this sad time.

love, megan

Blowing out the candles of Another year

2007-12-30T16:30:00.001-08:00

(by Vinny) Dec 24th. Megan's birthday. We made our annual birthday pilgrimage to Benihana's; a place where some things never get old: the onion volcano; the mickey mouse rice, Mason using his chop sticks so he looks like Wolverine; shrimp flying; and delicious fried rice. It was excellent! There are no pictures of that here but we have a wonderful birthday picture book with everyone's Polaroid’s in it! My Japanese chef was excellent, even if he spoke with a thick Latin American accent and had "Alejandro" written on his name tag. Megan's chef, one table over, was a greenie and we think it was his first time ever cooking there! But he sure tried hard! I sat a different table next to Tressa, who I would like to adopt but her parents refuse to allow it (c'mon!) Later we all went over to the Davies house where we had tons of fun watching the Christmas story acted out. I'll let Megan tell you about that later.... (so cute!!) We did have some excellent birthday cake for Megan. Here is a picture of Megan blowing out the candles on her cake. Looks like someone decided to help her out. Where was he when San Diego was burning down??? Forget the planes and firefighters!...They should have just called Mason!

vinny to the rescue...

2007-12-16T10:12:00.000-08:00

There I (Vinny) was....driving through the town of Perris just as nightfall changed the sky to a navy blue. I could see a plume of black smoke rising like a tempest above the houses on a nearby street. As I drove closer I could see the yellow glow of a fire ascending upward. Some dude's house was on fire!! I quickly pulled over and ran to the residence, passing a number of people taking pictures and gabbing on their cell phones while watching the blaze. I could tell it was in the backyard and so I ran into the yard and along the house to the rear of the property. There was a 6 foot fire that had engulfed the fence, a tree, and was spewing out out of some molten black mass on the ground ( in a previous life they were 2 large plastic trash cans). Luckily someone had shown up before me and was trying to fight the blaze with a hose, unsuccessfully. I grabbed a second hose and together, like Eegon and Ray, we crossed the streams and tried to close the fiery portal of death. It was like Backdraft... only worse. The smoke was horrendous... but we fought on! The fumes were toxic... but we persevered! Finally we were able to contain the blaze and eventually extinguished it just as the fire department arrived. Now I don't want anyone calling me up about this or giving me plaques or writing my name on some town shrine. I don't want to be treated any differently than your average hero.

best face ever

2007-12-03T13:05:00.001-08:00

i love kevin!

happy december to one and all!

2007-12-01T05:04:00.000-08:00

december hit the southern california deserts yesterday with a bang! so much rain...my dad and i took a walk around the neighborhood, then both decided it was a pretty dumb idea. but come on, as adults, how often do we still get to walk in the rain with our dads? not a bad morning.

well, i haven't posted for a few a few reasons but the main one being that i was in the hospital. let me just say here that if my spelling is loopy or my writing a bit meandering it is because i took some sleeping pills to help me sleep, and as you see, i am quite awake, but not quite alert. anyway, i went to the emergency room on a sunday night. i had had a quite severe stomache ache for about 3 days but didn't think i had anything to worry about because mindi had just had a similar stomache bug. (thanks min!) anyways, i started vomiting blood and that frightened me enough to get me to the emergency room.

let's say here that if medical terms and needles and such freak you out you may not want to read, but it's really not gross. just informational.

they were out of beds in the e.r. and so i took up residency in a cozy little cot out in the hall, bum flapping in the breeze for all to see. just kidding everyone - i wore my pj's and they had pants! after a few tests and prods they decided to admit me because i think they didn't have any idea what they were going to do with me and wanted me out of their hallway. so they sent me "upstairs" to a real room with the bed that moves up and down and all that. by that time the iv they had started on me in the e.r. was bleeding all over my hand and i wanted a new one and i wanted one now.

no one in the hospital is ever in a hurry. my nurse tried to put in a new iv and blew out the vein. then the head nurse tried (twice) and couldn't get it to work either. so they paged someone from the ICU unit and i had to wait for her. finally she came and said that i have good viens, they're just deep. i think that was her nice way of telling me that my arms are too fat. anyways, she couln't do it either and finally called in GABE, my angel in blue scrubs. one painless poke later and the iv was in. he is officially my hero and and my angel! he used to have to take blood from beligerant drunks at the police station, so he got very good at drawing blood in difficult cases.

anyways, i spent a few more days in the hospital to have this test, then that one. they are so slow there. by the end of my stay there i decided that they were more likely to kill you than cure you. oh, wait, one more scary story. i had taken a migriane medicine and started itching incredibly bad. in my semi-lucid state i thought that the oxygen mask i had on was making my face itch (not the allergy to the migraine meds, duh!), so i took it off and fell asleep. well, this girl wheels around a cart every hour to monitor your blood pressure, temp, and oxygen levels. she said that when she came in i was blue. my oxygen levels were 13 and need to be in the 90's. she put my oxygen back on and kept trying to wake me up. finally my nurse came in and started talking to me, which made no sense, because my ears sounded like someone had stuffed towels in them. it was the wierdest sensation. after a couple of hours i was back to normal but that really scared me. i had basically stopped breathing.

i'm home now, and i have a diagnosis : i have h.pylori bacteria in my stomache. they biospsied the lining of my stomache and found this lovely little bacterial infection. i'm on ani-biotics and should be back to my routine of milking cows and running marathons shortly.

here's a photo of GABE my new favorite man in blue scrubs...

am i in heaven?

2007-11-07T18:06:00.001-08:00

...nope, just sprinkles. which is my idea of heaven.

my mom and i drove up to orange county to go to roger's gardens (an awesome garden/gift store) and look at their christmas stuff and their gardens. -by the way, if anyone is wondering what to get for me for christmas i found it there! it's a chandelier and it only costs $2,700. that's just pocket change!!!

anyways, after roger's gardens we went over to sprinkles which is this awesome cupcake store in los angeles and orange county. (it was on oprah -- ooh la la!) i pulled out my camera and took a picture, while the girl behind the counter told me that there is no photography allowed in the store -- oops!

look at all the pretty little cakes!!!

yum!

we ordered a lemon one and a pumpkin one so that we could share them.

now brynn, i know what you are going to say. i put the milk in the photo specifically so that you wouldn't say that they look like boobs!!!

the cupcakes are totally awesome.

mom loves the lemon one!!!

we ate both of the cupcakes...

but we don't like the dots on top that they import from france - yuck.

we decided to go buy some more to "take home to our husbands."

dad looks so happy!

and i am happy because vinny doesn't really like them - more for me!

mindi is my hero!!!

2007-11-07T18:04:00.000-08:00

mindi durst is my hero!!!

thanks for figuring out my picture problem!

love you...

pics from the post of vinny's car trouble

2007-11-07T18:02:00.000-08:00

am i alone here?

2007-11-06T21:05:00.000-08:00

am i the only one who can't get photos to load onto blogger.com? it's making me so crazy!!!

hasn't this happened before?

2007-11-05T10:06:00.000-08:00

Saturday I (Vinny) was out and about appraising and, as usual I found myself on a very unfriendly dirt road. I went to back up and there was this little rock I didn't see that hit my undercarriage. The rock, like the iceberg from Titanic, was much larger underneath and as I went over it the tiny piece that hit my front axle enabled my car to push the whole rock out from the ground, revealing a much larger menace which did some damage. My car became high- centered and I was stranded in a dead-cell-phone-area on the outskirts of the Cleveland National Forest (which is no where near Cleveland, by the way). Luckily these burly 3 men where nearby and although they didn't understand English they certainly understood my situation. They saved my bacon! I refer to them as my 3 amigos. They didn't want their picture taken. They didn't understand the word "blog" either. Oh well, I snapped one anyway and caught 2 of them on camera! Gracias amigos!

sorry - the picture thing on blogger isn't working, so stay tuned for the photos.

a proud sister

2007-11-03T17:08:00.001-07:00

so i just got a call from my little brother Alex, who is a political science major at byu. he is an awesome guy. first of all, he is tall and handsome, served an awesome mission in harrisburg, pa, and he's super good in school. he's at byu on scholarship. i can brag about him since he's my brother. his gpa is off the charts amazing and he's hoping to attend harvard to get his law degree and mba all at the same time. anyways, he just called to tell us that he got accepted to the internship program he applied for. only 22 students are accepted all together. he is going to washington d.c. for the entire summer, but he doesn't yet know who he'll be interning for. isn't he amazing? we sure think so!!! stay tuned for some pictures of alex - i'm having trouble with my photos right now!

a sign from above?

2007-11-02T21:45:00.001-07:00

vinny was in the car today, full of road rage at the slow moving traffic. then he noticed this license plate in front of him.

hmmm...

cravings...

2007-11-02T17:00:00.001-07:00

this is how i feel about chocolate cake today!

quick fire update

2007-10-30T05:10:00.000-07:00

there are still a number of fires in southern california, but the one in fallbrook is either out or contained. the evacuation order on all of fallbrook has been lifted and everyone is allowed back in. the entire trailer park on reche rd, (near the spackman's house) burned down. also, sad to say, spencer hampton lost his house, too. our prayers are with all those who lost their homes. and we are so thankful for the fire fighters for working so hard to save so many homes. they are true heroes.

a moment of dancing in honor of scott's b-day!

2007-10-29T00:27:00.001-07:00

happy birthday to an awesome brother! welcome to your thirties! we love you!!!

six months of waiting...

2007-10-27T16:36:00.000-07:00

as all of you know vinny and i are trying to adopt a little girl from china. we put our application in with our agency well over a year and a half ago. this is an extremely slow process. today is the six month anniversary of having our dossier (all of our official paperwork) logged in at the chinese adoption headquarters in china. it's a big day for us! when we started this process we were told to expect to wait from our dossier being logged in and our referral date (the date you get to see a picture of your baby) about one year. now that estimation has reached TWO YEARS and could still possibly climb higher. but we know that all things are in Heavenly Father's time frame and we are ok with the wait. it's just more time to buy frilly dresses and dream about how we are going to decorate the nursery! seriously, we can't wait to go to china and hold our sweet baby in our arms, but the past six months have gone by faster than we expected. thanks to all of you and your support during this wait - we love you all!

no soup for you!!!

2007-10-27T11:52:00.001-07:00

let's boogie!

2007-10-27T11:45:00.001-07:00

here's a little something to make you laugh...

update on fallbrook

2007-10-26T17:44:00.000-07:00

ok. so, late last night we heard that certain neighborhoods in fallbrook were being let back in. my parents made some phone calls and learned that their neighborhood is one of them. they packed up this morning and headed home to see that ALL IS WELL! my mom even said that the air quality isn't too bad. there are definitely areas that still aren't allowed back in, like east of Gird Rd, but the fire is gradually being contained. our thoughts and prayers are with all of those who are displaced and especially with those who have lost their homes. we have heard that at least 200+ homes were lost in fallbrook. we have heard rumors of people we know losing their homes, but i won't post this until we know for sure. i'll update again when i learn anything new.

fires in fallbrook

2007-10-23T10:46:00.000-07:00

just a quick note for those wondering about my family in fallbrook. there are two fires raging there, and the ENTIRE town of fallbrook has been evacuated. my parents and their dog are staying at our house. my cousin brett went into fallbrook very early this morning and my parents house is safe, as is my aunt and uncle's. my dad left a little while ago to go check out the house, but every road leading into fallbrook in barricaded. craziness. i'll update again later if anything changes.

Car Splash Fuzzy Memories Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

2007-10-20T16:44:00.001-07:00

incognito

2007-10-15T16:38:00.001-07:00

today vinny and i went grocery shopping. it's time to make some soup!

i know i don't look happy in this picuture, but i am. i just don't like how my smile looks.

love you all! come on over for hot soup!

Monty Python - Dead Parrot

2007-10-14T13:37:00.001-07:00

Apple Pie in the sky

2007-10-14T13:07:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Vinny and i went to Julian with my mom and dad. we all piled into the mighty avalon, where dad tried to kill us a number of times on the winding roads.

(The avalon is the middle car - dad did an awesome job of parrallel parking!)

The weather was cool and fresh. and so were the apples! for those of you who don't know, julian is a sleepy little mountain town where we go in the fall to pick apples and eat and eat and eat apple pie. preferably with cheese on top. want a taste?

sorry, we ate it all! there is also a shop with tons of kinds of yummy stuff: from candy to nuts to chocolate to apple cider to candy apples.

these are vinny's favorite apples - covered in sugar!

vinny kept looking for the tree that grew these apples... but couldn't find it.

we also saw a sad homeless man. do you recognize him?

Wait, isn't that dad?

come to think of it, where's mom?

oh, there she is!

peekaboo, mom!

we had a super fun time in julian!

the monty python sketch is one of Vinny's favorites. enjoy!

middle of the night

2007-10-13T00:46:00.001-07:00

i'm trying to sleep, but (obviously) cannot. so i decided to show you where we came up with our blog name - soul rebels. we love the band old crow medicine show (thanks bridget!) and i fell in love with their cover of bob marley's tune. it's awesome. and if vinny and i are anything, we are soul rebels.
Enjoy! i think i accidentally did the slide show as a seperate entry. i'll get the whole blog thing soon, i promise!

Soul Rebel - Old Crow Medicine Show

2007-10-13T00:45:00.001-07:00

here we go...

2007-10-12T13:56:00.000-07:00

Vinny and Megan welcome all to our blog. It may be odd, it may be boring, it may be super cool; whatever it is, it is us.

love is a place

and through this place of

love move

(with brightness of peace)

all places

yes is a world

and in this world of

yes live

(skilfully curled)

all worlds

--ee cummings