Here I am. In the airport. You know- in those tiny seats all lined up in a row. They are like training seats for the airplane. They are "getting you ready" for how it is really going to be. Is that my armrest... or yours?
When I got here I stood in line waiting for the "check in" lady to call me. I stood there for 5 minutes knowing I was the next in line. Finally the lady came over to me and invited my to the counter where she told me I could use the self-check-in kiosk. It was like being in a grocery store and a checker coming up to you and saying I am ready for you to check yourself out now! It didn't take long for me to realize that I didn't not have to have waited in line at all and there were plenty available. I guess I am a bit of an old fashioned traveler.
As the kiosk sent me through the screens I finally got to a point where I could select my seat. I picked a window seat. Then the screen asked me if I wanted a seat upgrade. Hmmmm. So I looked into it. They are offering me "economy plus" and advertising 5 more inches of leg room for $40.00 per flight (I have 2 flights to get to Orlando). That's 80 bucks for 5 inches! That's $16 per inch. I was glad I am not tall. I am amazed at how we have reduced ourselves to adding surplus prices on seats with 5 more inches of leg room. Just ask for the exit row!
I went through security. As I walked through the metal detectors the TSA agent informed me that "I had been selected by my airline for a more thorough screening". Great, I thought. Why couldn't they select me for first class? Why could they select me to come to the front of the lines, why couldn't they select me to get free flyer miles? No, instead I got the full screening treatment. You know the drill.
My father in an airport is very interesting. Airports are full of escalators and moving-walkways, and these items are the antithesis of Jim Disanza. Using an escalator showed weakness and laziness! He tho
ught they were horrible. I do remember him showing me in a mall how he could go up the down escalator and get a good "burn" in his quads by the time he got up it. I, of course, had to follow. I was accepted by my father but was surely mocked by any peer that saw me. Dad in an airport. He was amazed at how fast he could run or climb when he was on a people-mover or escalator. You couldn't stand there! You had to move! move move move. That was my old man. He had to be in motion, had to be going somewhere, had to be on his way, and it rarely mattered where he was going so long as he did it very fast and got a good burn out of it.
When I got here I stood in line waiting for the "check in" lady to call me. I stood there for 5 minutes knowing I was the next in line. Finally the lady came over to me and invited my to the counter where she told me I could use the self-check-in kiosk. It was like being in a grocery store and a checker coming up to you and saying I am ready for you to check yourself out now! It didn't take long for me to realize that I didn't not have to have waited in line at all and there were plenty available. I guess I am a bit of an old fashioned traveler.
As the kiosk sent me through the screens I finally got to a point where I could select my seat. I picked a window seat. Then the screen asked me if I wanted a seat upgrade. Hmmmm. So I looked into it. They are offering me "economy plus" and advertising 5 more inches of leg room for $40.00 per flight (I have 2 flights to get to Orlando). That's 80 bucks for 5 inches! That's $16 per inch. I was glad I am not tall. I am amazed at how we have reduced ourselves to adding surplus prices on seats with 5 more inches of leg room. Just ask for the exit row!
I went through security. As I walked through the metal detectors the TSA agent informed me that "I had been selected by my airline for a more thorough screening". Great, I thought. Why couldn't they select me for first class? Why could they select me to come to the front of the lines, why couldn't they select me to get free flyer miles? No, instead I got the full screening treatment. You know the drill.
My father in an airport is very interesting. Airports are full of escalators and moving-walkways, and these items are the antithesis of Jim Disanza. Using an escalator showed weakness and laziness! He tho
ught they were horrible. I do remember him showing me in a mall how he could go up the down escalator and get a good "burn" in his quads by the time he got up it. I, of course, had to follow. I was accepted by my father but was surely mocked by any peer that saw me. Dad in an airport. He was amazed at how fast he could run or climb when he was on a people-mover or escalator. You couldn't stand there! You had to move! move move move. That was my old man. He had to be in motion, had to be going somewhere, had to be on his way, and it rarely mattered where he was going so long as he did it very fast and got a good burn out of it.
2 comments:
Flying is even more painful with kids. About 4 years ago and on an early a.m. flight Atlas (who was 7 and in batman pajamas and rain boots) got called in for a more thorough screening. Such a joke. It was just me and all the kids....
Bridget, there was a time when everyone in Gotham City didn't like the Batman. You may have just been travelling at the wrong time. But I am laughing picturing Atlas getting the full screen in his PJs and boots!!!
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